It’s Okay to be Selfish

You may think this title has a negative connotation but that is not my intention.

We are at the beginning of a three-day weekend and I woke up this morning with the intention of being selfish and spending these three days doing whatever I want to do.  I am taking care of myself first this weekend.

I live an extremely busy lifestyle.  I am a business woman running two full-time business entities.  I am a grandmother that craves seeing my grandson so every minute I can squeeze in holding him I will.  I am on a board of directors that requires me to answer several emails a month and attend meetings.  I blog weekly and speak.  Lexie and I do podcast sessions, plan workshops and attend events promoting Grateful gratitude.  We are also keeping up with multiple social media platforms.   I am a devoted wife that takes care of our home.  Below are just a few things from last week.

Now stop and reread the things I listed in my life.  You probably are doing the exact same amount of things and more.  Be selfish and take time for you first.  When you take care of yourself your life will be more fulfilled and believe it or not you will have more time in the day.  You will be relaxed which will make you more production leaving you guilt free for being selfish.  Let’s remove the word selfish and replace it with giving.

It’s okay to be more giving to yourself.  Does that make you feel better and eager to give to yourself as opposed o being selfish?

When I give to myself it requires little thought.  I love to read, write and meditate so these go on my list for these next three days.  I love to pray and communicate with God and I am going to up my prayers during this time.  I love doing laundry, look out closets, bedding, family room blankets and anything else that is washable.  Let’s don’t forget my passion cooking and eating.  Let’s look at my indulgences more closely.

I have many friends that have recommended a book title to me many times over the summer.  It is called “Girl Wash Your Face” by Rachel Hollis.  When I read the intro to the book it just didn’t hit me in the face like many other books do.  But I look at the subtlety of it all to see more insight.  Many friends have said it is amazing and every time I am looking to read a new book I see someone post it on social media about this book or it pops up on Amazon when I login.  I get it!  I am going to start reading it this afternoon.  The good thing with a book is that if you aren’t enthralled with it in the first few chapters you can always put to down for another time.  I am selfishly going to read!

Writing has been a passion of mine since I was in the fourth grade.  My teacher, Mrs. Demullins had us write a short story on construction paper pages dividing the story up on eight pages.  We then took two pieces of cardboard and covered them with fabric scraps  The last step was to have her punch holes in the left side of the cover and we would lace up and tie off yarn to hold the book together.  This is one of my favorite childhood memories of school.  This was my first book.

I also had a teacher in 9th grade that taught us how to journal.  Miss Klatt was a very unique lady.  She had dark, curly hair that was very unruly and most times looked uncombed.  She had a mustache that needed waxing and talked very loudly.  I think I loved her so much because of her quirkiness.  She would always say to “pour your heart out in your journal and make it your best friend.”  This message has never left me.  Here I am selfishly writing my blog and delighting in giving back to myself.

Meditating is vital to my existence.  When I silence myself I can not only hear God’s whispers in my heart but I feel my blood pressure lower.  A beautiful calm comes over me and my heart beats contentedly.  I meditated this morning when I got up around 6am.  I love centering myself with my breath in the early morning.  It sets my intention for the day and I feel healthier.  I am selfishly going to meditate multiple times this long weekend.

After mediating I am more open to pray more effectively.  I am more calm and I can put my words together more completely in prayer.  I can really focus on asking God for His guidance and strength with issues I am facing.  I get so much more from sincere, honest words when praying.  I am personally more fulfilled.  I have two alarms on my phone to remind me to stop my day and thank God for all His blessing through prayer.

On a lighter note I do love to do laundry.  I love sorting clothes, adding nice smelling detergent and most of all folding or hanging up clothes.  I would do laundry for the world if I had it in me.  I think I really like doing the laundry is because it represents becoming clean again.  I think in my life I constantly need cleansed.  It may be because I pass judgement on someone or maybe waste time.  The laundry gets soiled throughout the week in many ways.  I spill on myself when I eat most days. Our cats lay on our blankets in the family room and get them covered in hair.  I inserted a picture of our cats on one of the blankets below.

I feel so satisfied to toss things in the washer, have them rotated around by the agitator and have them come out clean.  I also relate this to attending church.  I walk in each Sunday feeling a bit soiled.  I listen to our amazing preachers speak (rotating my mind like the washer’s agitator) and then walking out of church brighter and cleaner.  Everything is getting washed this weekend including my soul.

I am going to cook meals for the week on this long weekend.  I have a relationship with food that it becomes my best friend when I am stressed.  Yes, I am the dreaded stress eater.  I have to constantly do a reality check before I put something in my mouth.  Below is a picture of me just two and a half years ago.  I was hovering near 200 pounds and was far from healthy.

I got to this extra weight by stress eating and bingeing on food.  My biggest fault was eating after my family had gone to bed.  They didn’t know I was consuming around 1,000 calories in my late night binges.  I now only eat 1,200 calories a day to put that in perspective.

When I become selfish or giving to myself in the kitchen I can prepare healthy snacks and meals to have ready when I get home from a busy day of constant running.  I am tired and hungry when I get home and this opens me up for overeating or snacking before dinner.  When I go to the freezer to start dinner there are all my healthy meals looking back at me.

Now you may not think this is selfish but it is because I prepare meals I like and my husband always graciously eats them even though I know some are not his favorite.  You see I substitute all high fat cheese with low-fat cheeses which don’t melt very well.  I also use spray butter instead of full fat butter which compromises on flavor.  I have to be selfish when I do this because I can’t go back to that unhealthy overweight person.  I can’t serve others effectively when I am in that place.

I really hope that you strongly consider being selfish (or giving to yourself if you like that better) soon.  You whole life and existance relies on you taking care of you first.  Turn to God and say, “Lord I am going to take care of myself and let you guide me in giving to me so I can be the best I can be to serve others.”  God would love to hear you say these words.  You will be better for yourself, your family and the world around you if you just be a little selfish today.

Blessing to you!

My gratitude & love-LoLo

1 Corinthians 3:16, NIV Don’t you know that you yourselves are God’s temple and that God’s Spirit dwells in your midst?