You may have read or heard the saying many times, “Let go, let God!”. You may have heard it so many times that you don’t even hear it anymore yet it is the most important phase of all time. Reference Proverbs 3:5-6:
Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight.
As we go through our day-to-day life we think we are in control of everything. We control what time we get up, what time we get to work, where we eat lunch, what appointments we will make and so on. Most times we are on autopilot just doing our thing. We have everything under control and we are the one who decides everything.
Then something unexpected happens. You get a phone call from your dad that your mom is at the heart hospital and she is going to need immediate heart surgery. There went my control. I was actually laying in bed with a respiratory infection feeling so puny and weak. My mom had to have an angiogram done in the morning and I wasn’t fit to go while she had the test done. My amazing husband took of work to sit with my dad and visit with the doctor after the test. My husband called. “Your mom is going to have open heart surgery tomorrow. It can’t be put off.” The next thing I knew I was on my way to the heart hospital in a complete dazed and feeling awful.
As I walked into the room my mom had been assigned. I sat there in disbelief. My parents were just in The Keys in Florida the day before and now my mom is awaiting open heart surgery. I was still shaking my head as to how my life could change over night and how I suddenly lost control. Not only was I sick as a dog but I was going to have to help and support my family through this health crisis.
I listened as the heart surgeon spoke of the six-hour open heart surgery that would happen in the morning, how they would put my mom on a machine to keep her heart beating and breathing for her. I heard her say it would be a quadruple bypass since two of her heart valves were 100% blocked, one was 95% blocked and the fourth one 75% blocked. I wondered how my mom who walked everyday for exercise could have possibly had this much blockage and still function.
The next morning came. My dad, my husband and I sat for six and a half hours patiently waiting to hear the surgery was over and a success. I can still remembered the upholstery pattern on the chairs and the swirl on the tile floor from staring at them for so long and constantly praying. There was even a cute black lab named Grace (appropriate) that came and visited everyone in the waiting room. You could pet Grace and she would just sit and look at your with her big brown eyes comforting you.
I remember the other family in the waiting room with us. Their family member’s prognosis wasn’t as good as my moms. Their family member needed a heart transplant and needed it right away. As much as I was suffering with worry about my mom I had to be grateful she didn’t need a heart transplant.
I continued to pray for God to watch over the surgeon, nurses, anesthesiologist and medical team assisting with my moms surgery. God please keep my mom strong through this procedure. I prayed hard and long and then I realized I needed to let go and let God take over. I had heard it before and I had practiced it before. I needed to do it again.
I walked over to the window and looked up to the beautiful fluffy white clouds and said to myself, “God, I know you already have this situation handled and I have no control over what your plan is for my mom. I trust completely in you Lord and I promise to be at peace and let your will be done.” The minute I finished praying my dad’s cell phone went off and the message my dad received was that my mom was in recovery and her prognosis was good. They even said the heart muscle wasn’t damaged and the problem was all the blockages. This was the best news we could have received. Thank you God.
As my mom stayed in the hospital for several days I again realized my life was turned upside down. My dad stayed with my mom during the days and I would sleep all day (which isn’t easy) and stay at the hospital all night long.
It is so tough seeing your mother weak and frail after open heart surgery when you are used to her taking care of everything. Not only is she my mother but she is also my boss. You can imagine this made my family life and work life a complete mess. When you have a sick parent at least you can work and get away for a bit to a different life. I couldn’t do that because I was literally doing the bosses work from a hospital room while caring for my mother. Her clients never knew she had surgery because she would dictate emails to me for her clients in the short periods she would be awake.
The nights were long on a hospital makeshift couch/bed. Internet was spotty and the food left quite a bit to be desired. You know it didn’t matter because I knew God was caring for my mom and He was giving me the strength I needed to do my part.
It took several months for my mom to be back fully to work and feeling good but I am blessed I was able to be with her to help keep everything going. I would get up in the morning and let my life flow without trying to control any aspect of this situation. I was at peace. God was in control.
You may find yourself in a similar situation, maybe a family member has a health crisis, you may be in an abusive relationship, your finances may be in dire straights. If you are please let go and let God! Set a timer for fifteen minutes. Sit quietly to allow your mind to clear of you worry or anxiety and when it as clear as it can be, open your heart and pray. Ask God to take control of your situation. Let Him know that you fully trust Him to solve this problem. Stop being a human for a few minutes and resign all control to Him. The worst thing that will happen is you can’t let go and you are no worse off and you are still right where you are. The best thing is when you truly let God take over you will instantly feel a sense of peace in your heart and mind. I promise you will feel it immediately when you genuinely turn to God and trust.
I am speaking to you from experience and I tell you in many of my blogs that the only way I was able to survive a drug and alcohol riddled marriage, an extremely anxious and OCD period with my daughter, a huge loss of income and this particular situation was to trust God. Each and every one of these situations when handed over to God turned out better than I could have ever expected. I have a second marriage that is spectacular, my daughter now ministers to others with OCD and anxiety, I am gaining new clients for my business everyday and my mom is still doing great.
I have written many times that God wants the very best for us. He doesn’t want us to suffer He only wants us to love Him unconditionally and love our neighbors. When we follow what God asks of us we are always rewarded. Hear God, love God and let go and let God.
All my love and prayers for you-LoLo
“Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight.”